It Is Possible To Make Your Ex Boyfriend Want You Back
You can make your ex boyfriend want you back if you think with your head instead of your heart. I know that is a difficult thing to do when your world has been turned upside down, but trust me…..you CAN keep it together long enough to fix your relationship.
First, make sure it is a healthy relationship and not abusive in any way. I never advocate anyone staying in a relationship that is potentially harmful. If you decide it is something to definitely save, then please read on.
If you are desperate for an immediate fix, then you can skip this post and make your ex boyfriend want you back right now.
Okay, let’s get started.
The number one objective here is to gain control of the situation.
If you are reading this right now, then your boyfriend probably wanted the break up and you didn’t. That means he is in control of the situation right now, and you need to turn things around so you are in control (or at least have SOME level of control). Your head needs to stop spinning, right?
What you want right now is to look independent and basically like you don’t need him. (Girls who play hard to get always get (and keep) the best guys, right?) There’s something about a girl that you have to pursue a little bit that drives guys wild. That’s what you want to facilitate. Not only are you going to get him back, but you are going to make him come to you. Trust me….guys just LOVE the chase. It’s human nature – they can’t help themselves.
So here are some specific steps to get you started.
1. Don’t Answer the Phone Every Time He Calls
You have better things to do than sit around waiting for him to call. Now, this doesn’t mean you should stay home and ACT like you are not home. Really go out and do things that you enjoy – even if you have to MAKE yourself enjoy it. Take up some new hobbies and get involved in some causes. When you return his call, don’t do it immediately. Let him wonder why you were too busy to call him. At some point he will realize that you are not sitting at home waiting for him to come back, and trust me, this will certainly be a new realization for him.
2. Go On Vacation With the Girls
Get a group of girls together and go somewhere fun. This is always good therapy when you are stressed. You can all complain about men until you feel euphoric and get it all out of your system, plus it will drive him insane wondering what you did while you were gone. This ALWAYS drives guys crazy when ex girlfriends go out and get an exciting life without them. It makes you look irresistible in their eyes. They see you in a whole new light. I know countless girls this has worked for.
If you have a Facebook or MySpace, be sure to post some pictures and details about the trip (but not TOO many because you don’t want to look like you are rubbing it in his face). Even if he doesn’t see it, some of your mutual friends will be sure to tell him.
3. Agree That the Break Up Was a Good Idea
This reverse psychology move works wonders. He wants to be the one to call it off, but he starts feeling insecure when you suddenly don’t want him either. He gets that “what’s wrong with me” feeling going on and suddenly starts rethinking the whole situation. This is simply human nature, works on men and women, we can’t help it.
4. Do Not (Under Any Circumstances) Have Any Sexual Contact With Him
After you start all the above moves, there is a good chance he will try to have sex with you just to see if he can still talk you into it. It is partly a male ego thing for him. You hold ALL the power here. Don’t even act like you would consider it. If you give in, it will make him drop you again and go away feeling smug about himself. You want to look just out of reach and make him wonder what you are thinking and what your next move will be. At this point you will look slightly mysterious to him.
Now, I know the no sex thing will probably be the most difficult part for you, so don’t put yourself in a situation that is too difficult for you to control. Don’t be alone with him if that’s what it takes to keep you from getting carried away.
5. When He Starts Wanting To Talk, Don’t Go Back To the Way Things Were
Here is a huge mistake people make: He comes back around and wants to talk. You are so happy you completely lay everything out on the table. You tell him how miserable you have been and how you wanted to kill yourself without him. You are ready to have make up sex and return to life before the break up.
This is bad, bad, bad. I don’t mean you should be deceitful or misleading in any way. However, you should not let him know that everything you have been doing is just a facade. If this relationship is fixed over time, then you can tell him more as time goes by…or not. It’s up to you. You should not have sex with him again until you are happy with the way things are going. If you are afraid he will leave again, on any level, then it’s not time to give that much yet. It will complicate everything too soon. You want him to be invested in the relationship before you consider that level of intimacy again.
6. Don’t Do Anything Spiteful
You love this person, right? So show love, not negative emotions toward him.
Don’t date his best friend, show up uninvited at his sister’s birthday party, crank call him, follow him anywhere, etc. Remember, you will be too busy living your own life. And doing anything spiteful just makes you look bad and will only damage your chances of a healthy relationship in the future. Remember, you want to look slightly indifferent about the whole situation.
This article contains the beginning steps to make your ex boyfriend want you back. For a more specific plan with exact examples, please visit The Magic of Making Up.
For a more specific plan for girls check outGetting Him Back. This resource was written by Michael Webb, the Oprah Winfrey love expert.
You are now armed with the tools you need, so go get him, girl!
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Thanks a bunch!
by Angela Christian Pope aka Angela Monahan @ ModernRelationship.org